How I can help
When you want self-development...
when you want more clarity and focus....
when you want more confidence....
when you want energy and motivation...
when you want to lead a meaningful life....
when you want to achieve your goals....
when you want a supportive inner voice...
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.... I would love to support and help you grow!
SELF-
Coaching sessions to improve your personal development
(Super)parenting
Coaching sessions to empower parents and better connections
MAHA LILAH
An ancient board game to inspire and seek answers about the mystery of life
My (hero)story
Coaching sessions to take control of your narrative and write your hero story.
DISC Profiling
Awareness to understand behaviours, communication and relationships
Together-ings
Personal development on guided themes with the support of a group
My Coaching Style
I believe everyone is unique. You are unique. You have your own pace and your own timing.
You have your own values and beliefs. You have your own ideas and challenges.
You have your own unique personal view of the world.
I believe a personal tailored program is always better served.
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I like to use coaching as my main driver and strategically apply NLP techniques and other tools to enrich the sessions.
One thing I always say to my clients is to be honest and kind.
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I believe there is no right or wrong when you want to work on yourself and in feeling better with yourself. But I believe there is the right combination of people – both parts must feel comfortable for a trusting relationship.
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I believe our resources like time and money are to be invested well, so there is no need to overdo with unnecessary number of sessions or inadequate timing. Remember coaching leads to transformation and results but those come from actions and practices. We have to respect the moment you are ready to commit to yourself.
All this to say that I prefer to tailor the service and number of sessions to each specific need.
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Besides the (open) coaching sessions, I organised structured options with pre-defined number and themed sessions, for parents to want to be even better at their roles, and for those who want to reconnect with their identity and meaningful journey. And gaining self-awareness through a well-respected personality test called DISC profiling; or by playing an ancient board game about the mysteries of life, called MahaLilah.
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A reminder: Coaching is professional and responsible, it is ruled by a code of ethics, and it is confidential. A certified coach does not judge, criticize, or set your dreams for you. A certified coach does not tell you what to do or do the actions for you. A coach helps you understand what is important and how do you want to move on. A coach listens and ask questions that only you have the power to answer and make sense.
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If you feel curious, heard something interesting and want to see if coaching is for you now, send me a message.
More information, please.
How Coaching works
Honestly, the best way to understand "what is coaching" is to experience a coaching session. It is a very personal and personalised experience, a positive, confidential, non-judgmental conversation.
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It is not just about professional growth and figuring a way to achieve goals faster; it is about being a leader of yourself, finding your own (super)powers and living a congruent life with your full potential. It is about treating yourself with kindness and honestly, finding support when you look in the mirror, and being your best version to yourself and your loved ones.
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In an (over)simplistic way to describe:
The client wants to be, to do or to have something, but it is not clear on how to move forward.
The client brings the idea to the coaching session.
The coach listens and asks questions – specifically about the idea.
Each session is focussed in one idea and ends with an action plan.
The coach helps the client find the answers (inside his mind where it is not clear and obvious).
The client feels empowered and capable of moving forward
The client moves past what was troubling or overwhelming
The client takes notes on insights and progress.
The client takes action and celebrates the progress.
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In a (funny) way to describe:
Client: Help! Tell me what to do!
Coach: Tell me what you want in your life.
Client: Then you will tell me what to do?
Coach: Then you will know what to do - by yourself and for yourself.
Client: What if I don’t know what to do?
Coach: I believe you can, and we can unlock the hidden answers together.
Client: Then it magically happens?
Coach: Then you make it happen in real life. And celebrate the journey.
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NLP is also best "felt" to be understood. But I like this story - summarised here - from Joseph O’ Connor's book:
A boy asks his mother what NLP is.
The mother tells him first to go ask the grandfather how his arthritis is today.
The grandfather replies that it is bad, it is hurting a lot and makes a painful face.
The boy goes back, and the mother tells him to ask this other question.
So, the boy asks: "Grandfather, what was the funniest thing I did when I was younger?"
The grandfather’s face lights up and he starts telling several stories of years ago, pausing to laugh and remember the details with attention.
The boy goes back to the mother, and she says: "You changed how he felt with a few words. That’s NLP."
What Coaching is not
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Coaching is not counselling or psychotherapy. If you have a distress or disorder or has trouble to function well, please find a certified professional as your first step. Coaching could be an additional support, but it is not therapy.
Coaching is for when you are not moving towards your future in the best possible way, you are not in the best rhythm, not clear or congruent, not confident or focussed to move on to your goals. You can do better but you are able to function well, you can be better, but are overall well.
After having a sudden and natural abortion in 2013, I was clinically depressed, I couldn't deal with pregnancy, baby or children news, I couldn't feel my usually happy feelings, I couldn't talk about what happened, and I couldn't get myself to celebrate when my best friends were expecting or celebrating. That was a case of therapy. It took me 2 years of suffering to finally seek and get help, so I urge you to look for the proper professional if it is your case.
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Coaching is not mentoring. A mentor is likely to share their own experience, offering handy tips and hints from their own learnings. It is great as an internal resource that leads and sends you in a certain direction.
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Coaching is not consulting. A consultant will work to solve a problem and give the client a clear and logical advice, providing framework, process and structure from benchmark and analytical studies.
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I will share (in the blog space) tools and insights you might try on your own, but know that is not coaching, those are ideas for personal development you can try and practice on your own. A coaching session is more than a toolbox.
Origins and Definitions
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Both coaching and NLP were created by curious minds looking for big-out-of-the-box answers on why some people perform better than others - in the sports field, in the academic or working environment. These academics, scientists, doctors, philosophers, psychologists, therapists, sports coaches, neuroscientists, human behaviour experts did a lot of research and practical experiences to find out how outstanding individuals and organizations get their outstanding results. The answers were mostly on how these successful winners dealt with themselves in the daily routine and how their mind worked and behaved through challenges and self-called failure.
​Here is my definition of coaching, that I wrote in my first day of Coaching school, sitting at a conference room in a hotel in London, in September 2019: “Coaching is about helping others move from where they are now to where they want to be next – much quicker and effectively than if they were working alone.”. After practicing with real life clients, I would change that last bit to match what gives me more satisfaction as a coach, and that is “helping others move to where they want to be next – with more clarity, more confidence, the right motivation and their own ideal pace.”
One of the first to introduce the essence of coaching was Timothy Gallwey, a Harvard educationalist and tennis expert that wrote the book "The Inner Game of Tennis" in 1974. The "inner game equation" is described as "Performance = Potential - Interference". And coaching focus on improving performance by increasing potential and decreasing interference. As we know well by now, internal thoughts are often more daunting than external obstacles, in the court, in the office and in life.
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The International Coaching Federation (ICF) with 50,000-plus members located in more than 140 countries and territories: “Partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. The process of coaching often unlocks previously untapped sources of imagination, productivity and leadership. We all have goals we want to reach, challenges we’re striving to overcome and times when we feel stuck. Partnering with a coach can change your life, setting you on a path to greater personal and professional fulfilment.“
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The Coaching Academy: “Coaching assists a client to bridge the gap between where they are now, to where they would like to be far more effectively than if they worked alone.”
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The role of a life coach, from The Coaching Academy: “A good coach is able to assist a client to obtain their desired goal(s). A coach achieves this with the use of powerful tools and techniques to help their client uncover their own answers, gain clarity on what they want and what could be holding them back. This level of awareness and support encourages their clients to break through any obstacles and go on to achieve their ambitions. The most vital role of a life coach is to help their clients unlock their potential, maximise their performance and get the results they are hoping for.”
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Sir John Whitmore: “Coaching is supporting people to grow themselves and their performance, clarify their purpose and vision, achieve their goals, and reach their potential. Awareness and responsibility are increased through inquiry, purposeful exploration, and self-realization. Coaching focuses on the present and future, is a complete partnership between coach and coachee as a whole (not broken or needing fixing), resourceful, and able to find their own answers.”
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NLP was created in mid-1970’s by John Grinder and Richard Bandler and stands for neuro-linguistic programming. It was enriched and keeps being improved by many outstanding thinkers and therapists. It sets principles and techniques to help reframe and give yourself more flexibility and options, see through more perspectives, expanding your mindset, helping you communicate better, interact better with people and much more.
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The ANLP International CIC, the Association for NLP, defines what NLP is and it is not: "NLP comprises models, techniques and strategies to help us understand how the language we use influences the way we think and the results we get! The original NLP models derived from modelling therapists such as Fritz Perls, Virginia Satir and Milton Erickson, but NLP is not psychotherapy, psychology, psychoanalysis, counselling, hypnotherapy, clinical therapy or pseudoscience!".
​Richard Bandler: “NLP is an attitude and a methodology, which leave behind a trail of techniques.”
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Robert Dilts: “NLP is whatever works.”